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Caesar: Are you, uh, a real dictator?Pompey: Well, uh, technically…nahCaesar: Have you ever beat a senate like, uh, Sulla Felix?Pompey: NahCaesar: Have you even won a war?Crassus: Nah, nah…Caesar: Alright! I can see that we will have to join in a Triumvirate!Hey!We are Number One!Hey!We are Number One!Now listen closelyHere’s a little lesson in trickeryThis is going down in history!If you wanna be Roman Number OneYou have to crush an Oligarchy on the run!Just take some legions, and loot a place, be careful not to get yourself killed![Crassus is captured by some Parthians and killed]Caesar: No, don’t do that!We are Number One!Hey!We are Number One!We are Number One!Ha Ha Ha!Look at this gold, that I just “found”When I say go, armlock the Senate!Go![Pompey drifts away from Caesar and ends up supporting the Senate instead]Caesar: Use it on them, not me!Caesar: Ugh, let’s try something else.Now watch and learn, here’s the dealI’ll beat you with force, I’ll make you kneel!Ha Ha Ha![Caesar defeats Pompey, Pompey runs away]Caesar: What were you doing?![Senate submits, Caesar takes sole power in Rome, roll Caesar’s dictator-for-life montage][Liberators begin to plot][Caesar walks onto Senate Floor]Caesar: Roman Number One!!!![Liberators reveal weapons, proceed to stab Caesar 23 times]Liberators: We are Number One!Octavian: Are you, uh, a real dictator?Mark Antony: Well, uh, technically…nah via /r/HistoryMemes https://ift.tt/2Tj6ZZB